Dear Universe, Don’t Fuck This One Up

A polite request from a woman who has already survived enough romantic character development.

Dear Universe,

First off, I stole this idea from a Facebook post, so let’s not give me too much credit for creativity here. I am simply borrowing someone else’s emotional concept and making it significantly more dramatic. As is tradition.

Anyway, we need to talk.

I know I complain about you a lot. In my defense, you have made some deeply questionable choic…